blue
12:39 a.m.
i'm bummed. i'm depressed. i'm feeling sorry for myself. it'll pass...
i scanned my ugly mug tonight...my mood shows...
this is for ME:
"Do me wrong, do me right,
Say goodbye and say hello,
Go away then, damn you,
Tell me lies but hold me tight,
Save your goodbyes for the morning light,
But don't let me be lonely tonight
Sure enough good to see you, but it's time to go,
Don't say yes but please don't say no,
I don't want to be lonely tonight
Go on and do as you please,
You ain't gonna see me gettin' down on my knees
I'm undecided, and your heart's been divided,
You've been turning my world upside down"
"down on my knees"...shut up, you guys!
and a friend had kind of a shitty night, well, a real shitty night actually...this is what he said HIS self-portrait would look like tonight:
this is for HIM:
"People can be so cold
They'll hurt you and desert you
Well they'll take your soul if you let them
Oh yeah, but don't you let them"
oh fuck, i'm quoting james taylor and carole king, i MUST be depressed!
but really, people are so fucking stupid sometimes...aren't we lucky we're better than them?
i was gonna leave a note for someone i don't even know and ask her what kind of a friend she thinks she is, but the bitch doesn't even have notes or a guestbook...amateur!
look, i've read sailors and sexual identity by steven zeeland...a lot of those guys knew from experience that lots of marines are just big nellie bottoms when the lights go out...so there!
ahhh, i feel better already!
ok, i have to be up in 5 1/2 hours, so...that's it for now.
love me or leave me, but don't try to change me...
- michael