mr. misery
(elliott smith - '69-'03)
1:10 p.m.
email to rob:
wow, what a shitty thing to wake up to. i had like 2 minutes before i had to leave for work, and was checking my mail.
"elliott's died."
it wasn't a shock really, but i thought for sure it would have been an o.d. i checked the link real fast, and had to run. no time to think about it, to process it.
weird...he stabbed himself? that's so strange. looking at articles now...the E! online obit said he was always surprised that people asked him "why are you so sad?"
"Just because people have a range of emotions and thoughts...sometimes they get ecstatically happy about something and at other times ridiculously depressed, doesn't mean that there's something wrong with them." 
that was his answer.
i dunno, YOU met him once, what was your take on the guy? i remember a lot of heroin rumors last year, yet i heard he was doing some wonderful shows.
suicide...i just dunno what to think. it's always such a waste when someone has so much talent and it's not enough to sustain them. i always wonder if someone like that thinks about what happens after they're gone....their legacy, and all that. elliott always seemed pretty anti-stardom certainly, but i wonder if that taste of the big time fucked with him...he was so great on the oscars, it was so...real.
maybe he was bothered that in some people's eyes he was a one-hit wonder?
i'm sure, that in his fucked-up state of mind cobain thought to himself "well, after i'm gone, i'll ALWAYS be one of the greats, they won't get a chance to see my decline." but i don't think elliott was like that. great art can come out of pain, but i guess that doesn't always provide relief...OR release.
it's just sad that he saw that as the only way out.
god, larry must be getting a ton of phone calls and email.
i'm burning a candle NOW, cuz there wil be plenty going tonight, i'm sure.
well, i've stolen plenty of his songs...now i guess i'll be getting to know them.
it sucks that death is always such a boost to one's career.
i'll talk to you tonight...mk
thursday update:
oh, and here's what i had on my cam last night...
check out rob's comment, too...
rob sent me a copy of larry's message on the tape op board...he was all set to go down to l.a. to mix elliott's new album...it was the first he'd heard from elliott in a year...